SCOTT SIMON, HOST:
Let's hear now from StoryCorps Military Voices Initiative, recording stories from those who've served since 9/11 and their loved ones. Today, two people connected the invisible wounds of war. Stefanie Pelkey is a former U.S. Army captain. Her husband served in Iraq in 2003 and was diagnosed with PTSD when he returned. Army Sergeant T.J. Hart is also a veteran of the Iraq War. He also struggles with PTSD. Stefanie and T.J. became friends while volunteering at a veteran center in Houston, Texas. At StoryCorps, they talked about what happened once Stefanie's husband came home from war.
CAPTAIN STEFANIE PELKEY: When he came back, he wasn't the same person that left. His light was gone. That's the only way I know how to say it. He just didn't joke around anymore. He had a lot of anxiety. He'd shake his legs a lot while he was sitting there talking, like he'd tap his feet a lot. Also, he started sleeping with a gun, and he would sleep with it under his pillow, so he sought help. And probably about a month after, he took his life. He shot himself in our living room.
Does that sound familiar to you?
SERGEANT T.J. HART: Oh, yeah, it definitely does. I can tell you what was in your husband's mind 'cause it was in mine. I can tell you what it's like to pull that trigger. For me, the round didn't go off. I don't know why. There's no feeling. It's a numbness. I didn't feel like I was doing anything wrong. I thought I was doing my family the right thing. And it's so easy to justify and say maybe the right thing for me is to just disappear.
PELKEY: Well, I hope that I came into your life to show you that that's not the answer. I wouldn't have wanted to sit here and share this with anybody else because I know you understand.
HART: Stefanie, you are my little sister now. You remind me every day of what I could do to my family with one slip. Never once did I think about the aftermath - the sadness, the things that I would miss. And you've reminded me of that.
SIMON: Sergeant T.J. Hart with his friend, Captain Stefanie Pelkey, whose husband Captain Michael Pelkey committed suicide after he returned home from Iraq. He died in 2004. This interview was recorded in Houston as part of StoryCorps' Military Voices Initiative. And it will be archived at the U.S. Library of Congress. You can hear more on the podcast. It's on iTunes and npr.org.